“I don’t know how you do it. Being a single mom must be hard!” Ah, the famous line I hear almost daily. I am here to tell you that being a single parent is only hard if you make it that way. Sure, I never grew up thinking “I can’t wait to be a single mom!” The thought never even crossed my mind, until it happened.
I was 23 when I found out I was pregnant. I was barely making minimum wage and did not have health insurance. I didn’t know how I was going to be able to afford my baby and if I was even fit to be a mom. (I mean really, kids were the last thing on my mind at the time.) I thought my life was over.
I spent my entire pregnancy and the first year of my son’s life, crying. I was so overwhelmed, depressed, sleep deprived and so far in debt that I couldn’t breathe. I could literally feel my life going in a downward spiral. As I was laying awake one night watching my beautiful baby boy sleep, it hit me like a ton of bricks. All my negative thoughts were the reason my life was miserable. I was focusing on all the things that were going wrong instead of the things that were going right.
I spent the next year working on training my brain to see the beauty in all situations, good or bad. Now don’t get me wrong, this wasn’t easy. There were many days that I would break down and wave the white flag. (There are still days I have to breathe deep and remind myself that everything is going to be OK!) But by changing my thoughts, slowly by slowly things started turning around. Help would show up when I needed it. Money would appear when I felt like I was starting to drown. Opportunities would open up right when I needed them. I couldn’t believe that just by changing my thoughts, my life changed to.
Life will always throw you a curve ball, but its up to you to choose how it plays out. If you choose to believe that your life is hard, then guess what, it will be. Focus on the positive and I promise you, things will turn around for the better!